Ricki Lake opened up about her late ex-husband Christian Evans’ struggles with mental health.
The former talk show host recalled trying to “save” Evans — who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder — from his “psychotic breaks” before he died by suicide in 2017.
“I didn’t understand what bipolar disorder meant at first,” Lake told death doula Alua Arthur at End Well’s annual symposium on Nov. 22, according to People.
“I know he suffered from depression and had a lot of pain. We were together four years before he had his first psychotic break. It was almost more shocking seeing him turn into another person than his ultimate death.”
“I went to great lengths to save him; I did everything I could in my power to bring him to the doctor to get him help, and it was really challenging,” Lake, 56, continued.
“He had his second psychotic break two years after the first and ultimately took his life in [February] of 2017.”
Lake and Evans first started dating in 2010 after being introduced by a mutual friend, per People.
“He was super magical, and he was madly in love with me and I with him,” she said of their relationship, adding that they had a nontraditional first meeting that involved a “medical journey” with ayahuasca.
They were engaged in August 2011 and eloped in 2012. Lake and Evans split in 2014. However, they remained close until his death.
Lake described feeling as though she had failed Evans because she couldn’t “save” him.
“I’m a manifester, I get s–t done,” she said. “And when it came to fixing him, I couldn’t fix him, I couldn’t save him.”
Lake has since gotten remarried to Ross Burningham, but she keeps Evans’ memory alive by continuing to talk about her former partner.
“What I can say is through loving and losing him, I’m the best version of myself because of the way he loved me,” she said.
“I feel like I’ve learned so many lessons, so much about I love, and how we’re still connected and that they’re not gone,” Lake added.
“But he had to leave for me to have this beautiful, abundant life that I appreciate every day. I wake up in gratitude and am so appreciative of this life I had with him and now without him.”
If you or someone you know is affected by any of the issues raised in this story, call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988.
