A dating coach has detailed how to go about ‘detaching’ from someone you’re obsessed with when you’ve found yourself on the wrong end of a one-sided crush.
Gabby, who goes by @respectfullygabby on TikTok, leveled with her viewers that they needed to let go of whoever the object of their unrequited love was.
And she went further, also explaining how lovelorn individuals ended up falling so hard for someone in the first place when the feelings clearly weren’t mutual.
‘Let’s talk about how to detach from that person that you’re obsessed with. Trust me, I get it,’ she admitted.
‘I’ve been there, where you are just so enamored by this one person and you just can’t get them off your mind. In your head, you’re like, «This has to be it. This has to be the one. I can’t see myself with anyone else, this is my person.»‘
Gabby advised viewers on how to deal with unrequited love – as well as avoid falling too hard for someone in the future
Still, even the strongest feelings about said person can’t make them feel the same way back.
‘One of the main reasons why you’re obsessed with this person is because you don’t believe someone like them exists out there, or you don’t believe that you’ll find a connection like them out there,’ Gabby offered by way of analysis.
‘When you’re dating with that mentality of, «This is the only person,» you start to attach yourself to that person, you start to become obsessed.
‘Try to force the pieces together in order for them to fit, in order for them to want to choose you. But the thing is this: the second that you attach to anyone, you completely lose control, which is the exact thing that you’re trying to avoid.
‘The whole reason of attaching is because you want to control the pieces, you want to control the outcome. And that’s just not how life works,’ she bluntly reminded her jilted viewers.
‘Here’s how life actually works: You can’t control anyone, you can’t control anything, outside of yourself.
‘So if this person wants to be in your life, let them. If they don’t want to be in your life, let them. If they do want to see you, let them. If they don’t want to see you, it’s okay.’
All the while, keep in mind ‘the understanding that if it’s not this person, it’s going to be something so much better,’ she added encouragingly.
‘Trust me, I’ve been there,’ she admitted of being on the spurned end of a romantic dynamic
Many viewers took to the comments to praise Gabby for the sound advice – as well as offer their own time-tested methods for getting over someone
‘You don’t know what’s on the other side of this person. It could be your actual soulmate who treats you like gold, wants to put in the effort, you have a better connection, you have more things in common.
‘You don’t know because you’re so hung up on the wrong person. And whatever that person is meant to bring into your life, let them – whether it’s a lesson or a lifer. Never a loss!’
Many viewers were readily praised Gabby for the sound advice – while others volunteered their own time-tested methods for getting over a crush.
‘Omg YEEEEESSSS! All of it. PREACH. Especially the last part. I’ve been learning SO much,’ one wrote.
‘Needed that today,’ a second chimed in.
‘De centring men is the best thing I’ve done to control my [continued] limerance,’ a third professed.
