My daughter Nicole, 25, answered the phone with a cheery, ‘Hello, Mum.’
We spoke every Friday night, often for hours. That evening, after catching up on family news, she mentioned something that made my stomach tighten.
‘We’ve got a new guy at work who murdered someone. Reckons he blacked out and didn’t remember it afterwards.’
I was stunned. ‘You be careful around him,’ I said.
‘People change, Mum. Everyone deserves a second chance. You taught me that.’
She was right. I had raised Nicole and her three siblings to believe in compassion and redemption. I was proud of the kind, independent young woman she had become.
Nicole had left home at 17, eager to embrace the opportunities of a bigger city four hours away.
‘There’s so much more to do,’ she said.
Cherie Gillatt (right) fought for answers after her daughter Nicole Tuxford (left) was murdered by an ex-colleague who was obsessed with her
Nicole (pictured) showed pity on Paul Tainui, formerly known as Paul Wilson, a man in his fifties who had served time for killing a woman. He repaid her kindness with brutal violence
We remained close, visiting one another and keeping up our Friday night calls. She was 23 when she took an administrative job at a scrap yard. But her true passion lay in helping others, so a few years later, she began training as a life coach and counsellor.
That was when she told me about Paul Tainui. In his fifties, he had served time for killing a woman.
‘I feel sorry for him. I’m helping him with counselling,’ she confided.
Nicole had known Tainui for just over a year when she left the yard in February 2018 for a new job and to focus on her growing coaching business.
On Friday, April 6, we had our usual catch-up, laughing and chatting as always. She was staying at her boyfriend’s place that night.
The next evening, my world shattered.
Two police officers arrived at my home, accompanied by my youngest daughter, Jess, who was in tears.
‘Mum, Nicole’s been murdered.’
Nicole and her three siblings were raised to believe in compassion and redemption
I broke down, overwhelmed with disbelief. Who would want to harm my daughter?
The police said they had arrested Paul Tainui. He had strangled her. She was just 27.
When Nicole finally came home, it was in a coffin. As loved ones gathered to pay their respects, I noticed a bruise on her face.
‘Oh, Nicole, what’s wrong with your face?’ I murmured, bewildered, as if I could rub it away.
Her hands bore defensive wounds. I held them, weeping, telling her I loved her.
For the viewing, I wanted to place a soft pink scarf around her neck. But as I lifted her head, I felt lumps on the back – evidence of the brutal beating she had endured.
And then I saw it. Tainui had cut her throat. He had nearly decapitated her.
The next few days passed in a blur. When the undertakers came for Nicole, I wasn’t ready to let go. After they left, I drove to their offices and pleaded to see her one last time.
‘I can’t say goodbye yet,’ I sobbed. Mercifully, they allowed me in.
Then, as if I hadn’t already endured enough, the police delivered another blow. Nicole had been raped, too.
My sweet, compassionate girl had suffered unimaginably.
Tainui had killed before, yet under New Zealand law his past couldn’t be publicly revealed to ensure a fair trial. His previous victim, I learned, was Kimberly Schroder.
She had dated Tainui, then known as Paul Wilson, and dumped him.
He had already spent ten months in jail for threatening her with a shotgun. Then, in 1994, he broke into her home, tortured and raped her, and slit her throat, nearly decapitating her.
The crime was almost identical to Nicole’s murder, only Kimberly was even younger when her life was cruelly snuffed out.
Tainui received a 15-year sentence, later reduced to 13 on appeal. He was eventually released in 2011 after serving over 16 years. The parole board deemed him a low risk to reoffend, citing nearly 300 sessions with prison psychiatrists and a test indicating he was not a psychopath.
On release, he changed his surname from Wilson to Tainui.
Paul Tainui (pictured in court in New Zealand) admitted to raping and murdering Nicole. She wasn’t his first victim, as he’d previously killed an ex-girlfriend in the Nineties
Kimberly’s parents had fought to keep him behind bars. After Nicole’s death, the police introduced me to her mother, Nancy. Her father, Gary, had tragically taken his own life just three days after Nicole’s murder. His heart and spirit were broken by news of his daughter’s murderer killing again.
‘You shouldn’t be going through this,’ Nancy wept. ‘We warned them. We told them he’d kill again.’
In October 2018, Tainui admitted to raping and murdering Nicole, yet his name still couldn’t be published.
That Friday night, hours after I had last spoken to my daughter, police had stopped Tainui for drink driving. He had two knives in his car. Their checks revealed he was a convicted killer. They confiscated his car and weapons – and let him go.
He took a taxi to Nicole’s home, broke in and waited eight hours for her to return on Saturday morning. Then he ambushed her.
At his sentencing in March 2019, I learned more than I ever wanted to know. Nicole had been kind to Tainui, offering him guidance. It was unclear if she knew the full extent of his past, but it was in her nature to help.
Despite being twice Nicole’s age, Tainui had been obsessed with my daughter.
He harassed her at work and showed up uninvited at her home. When she rebuffed him and he discovered she had a boyfriend, he grew enraged.
Days before the murder, he sent her an angry text accusing her of betrayal.
She was a beautiful, kind and funny young woman in the prime of her life; he had been in jail and was twice her age. The only relationship was inside his warped mind.
Why didn’t she tell me what was happening? We were so close. She must have not wanted to worry me.
Despite being twice her age, Tainui had been obsessed with Nicole (pictured as a child)
On April 7, Tainui attacked. Nicole fought back fiercely, biting him. He punched her in the face, stunning her, then stuffed a scarf in her mouth, and bound her hands and head with insulation tape.
Then he raped her.
Finally, he stabbed Nicole in the shoulder with a large knife, before strangling her and cutting her throat multiple times.
At sentencing, I faced him.
‘You’re a worthless coward,’ I said in my victim impact statement. He couldn’t even look at me.
Judge Cameron Mander spoke directly to Tainui: ‘She sought to help you when few others would. It must have been a terrifying ordeal as she fought for her life.’
Tainui was sentenced to life in prison with a minimum of 28 years. He was 55 at the time. If he survives, he’ll be in his eighties upon release.
‘Old age won’t stop him. He’ll just pick younger, weaker victims,’ I told Nancy.
Incredibly, despite raping, murdering and almost decapitating two young women, he was not given a whole-life sentence.
‘What does it take for the key to be thrown away?’ I wept.
The parole board later defended their decisions, insisting that even today, an expert would not have predicted further violent offending based on the available information.
‘They need better experts,’ I thought bitterly.
Nancy and Gary had warned them. Common sense should have prevailed. Instead, the system failed at every turn. We pushed for more answers.
A 2020 review found it was ‘reasonable’ for police to have released Tainui after his drink-driving arrest, despite his criminal history.
Two years later, an inquest opened into Nicole and Gary’s deaths. I turned up with my daughter’s ashes in an urn.
More systemic failings came to light.
Three years before killing Nicole, Tainui had boasted in a pub about murdering Kimberly and tried to give people drugs. A witness reported it, yet nothing was done.
While on parole, he was also convicted of ten driving offences, including careless driving causing injury. Probation staff only knew about six.
If just one person had done their job properly, my daughter might still be alive
The driving offences alone were concerning. He could have been recalled to prison but, in the end, nothing happened.
When he got a job at the scrap yard, Corrections told his employer he was a convicted killer, but didn’t mention he was a rapist.
A probation officer claimed he’d told Tainui’s boss details of his crimes and his heightened risk in personal relationships with women.
The officer also said he’d told Tainui’s boss to get in touch if there were issues with Tainui’s conduct. But he didn’t make notes of this, and Tainui’s boss maintained the conversation never happened.
Tainui appeared at the inquest and confessed he had repeatedly lied to probation staff, telling them he was coping well. They believed every word.
In September 2024, the Coroner delivered his findings. He said the psychopath test Tainui passed needed improvement, as did monitoring of paroled offenders.
And he found the ‘breakdown’ in that process contributed to Nicole’s death, and therefore Gary’s.
But no individuals were held accountable. No officials apologised. They’ve all got blood on their hands.
Nancy and Gary knew Tainui would kill again. The experts had blinkers on; they never considered Tainui might be fooling them.
The rot started with the courts and Tainui’s weak 15 years for killing Kimberly.
From then on, anyone in authority Tainui met bent over backwards to help him or believed anything the depraved killer and rapist said.
If just one person had done their job properly, my daughter might still be alive.
