Valarie Clark Miller endured years of abuse, from the age of 13 until 15.
The men who systematically tormented her – threatening to kill her and her family if she ever spoke up – were members of the devout Mormon community in which she lived.
Memories of the abuse were so traumatic – and the shame so debilitating – that they remained repressed for years.
Meanwhile, a conspiracy of silence resulted in a decades-long cover-up within the police department and in the Utah town she called home.
But when her family decided to hire an investigative team and uncover the truth, they discovered that the appalling acts inflicted on Valarie were part of a much wider web of pedophilia and abuse that thrived on small-town loyalties and generational secrets beyond their own community.
Valarie in high school – when looking at this photo after the truth of her abuse had been revealed, her father Denzel said: ‘Maybe she wasn’t as happy as we thought’
Here, her ex-husband John tells his story exclusively, in his own words, to Dailymail.com.
I met Valarie in the hallways of our Cache Valley, Utah, high school in 1969 and was blown away by her beauty. Like – wow! – she was really, really pretty.
It was my junior year and her sophomore year and Valarie stood out from the crowd, with glossy dark hair and wide-set, piercing eyes.
She was also a star athlete, and whip smart, earning straight As throughout high school and college. Valarie was a real catch.
We married in her last year of college, and were blessed with four beautiful children – three girls and one boy.
When our oldest child, Annie, was six years old, she was nearly killed by a car while riding her bike. The accident plunged our family into months of medical uncertainty. And, while Annie survived, the experience left Valarie exhausted and vulnerable.
In the aftermath, she experienced increasingly crippling anxiety attacks, and memories of the repeated, violent sexual abuse she’d endured as a teenager started to surface.
She was also a star athlete, and whip smart, earning straight As throughout high school and college. Valarie was a real catch
Valarie with her beloved horse Leo. She stood out in high school with her glossy dark hair and wide-set, almond-shaped eyes
The men who raped Valarie held positions of trust in her small community of Clarkston, Utah
The two adult men who raped her held positions of trust in her small, rural community – one was a relative and one was a local law enforcement officer. The men threatened her life and the lives of her siblings if she did not comply or if she spoke out.
The sexual and physical abuse was systemic, long-lasting and deeply damaging. The scars it left were not just emotional or psychological; they cut to the very core of who she was.
As debilitating as it was for Valarie to deal with each memory resurfacing, she faced her reality with courage and hope. She wanted to heal.
After years of intensive therapy, including a full year at a live-in facility, Valarie and I went together to officially file a police report and make a claim against the men who had impacted her life so profoundly.
But even when she finally felt able to confront her abusers, like too many victims of sexual violence and abuse, she was failed by a system that was supposed to protect her.
As we filed the report, I knew deep down that the case would be covered up. I was quickly proven correct. A hasty, superficial investigation ensued, and the case was casually dismissed. Valarie was labelled a schizophrenic who had lied about her own rape and attempted murder.
We were devastated.
I cannot adequately emphasize the impact this had on our family. The fallout from sexual victimization includes poverty, substance abuse, depression, and suicide, and impacts not just the initial victim, but also their children and future generations. That continues to be the case in our own family.
I know now that healing from sexual trauma is a lifelong, generational effort. As a young father and husband, I did everything I could to help Valarie but was often at a loss.
Our children were caught in the crossfire, feeling the need to protect her with each mental health relapse and unexpected trigger.
Valarie made tremendous efforts to overcome her PTSD, but her pain was so great that every moment of progress was followed by harsh setbacks.
She became addicted to prescription drugs including tranquilizers and opioids, which she said gave her temporary relief ‘from my dread and anxiety, and a soothing sense that I was safe, nurtured and unconditionally loved.’
She passed away in 2017 as the result of a recurring urinary tract infection, without ever seeing justice. She was 61.
Then in 2020, our son suggested hiring a private investigator to gain a complete understanding of what had happened to his mother.
We hired a team consisting of former federal prosecutors and FBI agents who specialized in cold cases to uncover the full truth behind Valarie’s story, the suspected dismissal of our initial report in 1990, and more details about her perpetrators.
Valarie started to have flashbacks of the abuse she’d suffered as a child and teenager
The Miller family in 1991. From left, John, Ryan, Valarie, Brooke, Erin, and Annie
The truth was staggering. Valarie’s abuse and assaults were validated through more evidence than we ever could have imagined.
We also learned that her case was not an isolated one. In our small community, there were many more victims, abusers, and instances of systemic failure than just one woman’s story. More than 20 pedophiles were identified in a single town.
Lies had been allowed to spread unchecked. The police officer who dismissed our case admitted that he did not want to anger a fellow police officer. He traded a woman’s justice and healing for security in his career.
Throughout my marriage to Valarie, I felt a deep compassion for her, but I also felt a great deal of anger. I was incensed at what these men had done and so easily got away with.
In December of 2021, we took all the evidence that our investigation had gathered to the Attorney General of the State of Utah. The state recognized the extensive and disturbing evidence presented by our investigative team. They acknowledged the investigation over 30 years earlier had been a sham.
In an unprecedented move, the Utah Department of Public Safety issued a public apology to our family. The apology included a renewed dedication to review their systems for investigating claims like ours.
While the State recognized the horrors their actions subjected our family to, no official legal recourse could be taken. By this point, two of the three perpetrators of Valarie’s abuse were dead, and one was in prison for solicitation of a minor.
For Valarie, justice came too late, and she never received the chance to live with her name cleared and her truth acknowledged.
Still, the public apology meant a great deal to our family. We held the men responsible for her abuse accountable, and their names will forever be associated with the hurt they caused.
We found closure after decades of watching a beloved wife and mother suffer. And while justice took over 30 years in our case, we hope to encourage others in similar situations to know they can still come forward.
For every story like Valarie’s, there are thousands of others that will never be told. Our family wanted to do our part in raising awareness and breaking the cycle of abuse.
In the days following the Utah public apology, I received texts and calls from many friends and acquaintances. One moved me particularly.
A woman I’d known my whole life wrote me a note saying that after almost two decades of marriage, her husband told her he’d been abused by his uncle from age two until seven. The effects had, of course, touched all aspects of their marriage.
Family and reporters gather as the state of Utah issues a formal apology
The woman told me that, at age 65, after much agony and pain, her husband finally decided to go speak to a therapist, one who specialized in adult males who had been sexually abused as children.
But on the day of his appointment, her husband was admitted into the hospital with chest pains and was taken off life support two days later. He never got the chance to unburden himself.
Corruption and a small-town culture of secrecy led to Valarie’s abuse being hidden, covered up, and lied about for years. I have seen the worst of humanity and its impact on those I love most.
But I am not without hope. Bold, honest conversations about sexual violence will always create positive momentum. We can address the broken parts of our systems to ensure that they serve instead of hurt. We can bring light to the realities of sexual abuse and give hope to those suffering silently.
Valarie was full of life, faith, and love. Though she never fully overcame her abuse during her life, I think we have given her the peace she deserves. I know she would be proud of her family.
Hometown Betrayal: A Tragic Story of Secrecy and Sexual Abuse in Mormon Country by Emily Benedek is published by Greenleaf Book Group. 100% of profits will be donated to GenerationAll, a nonprofit whose mission is to drastically minimize the generational impact of sexual violence.
